Drew & the master chefs

Creativity

Within the last several months I haven't been as creative and it's so easy to compare yourself to not only other people around you, but also to your past self. That's really what I've been feeling for a long time. I'm not editing as much as I used to. I'm not with my band member who's still in Tennessee. Those were two very big things for me, creating these personal projects. Whether it be a funny sketch with a friend and editing that. Whether it be acting when I was back in the day doing theater. I have always been doing something very creative. Life has not afforded me as many opportunities recently as it once had.

Now I’ve stepped into adulthood. There are responsibilities and life circumstances are very different than they were. When I was in college, once you're done with your assignment, you can do whatever the heck you want. I've been chipping away at some projects here and there but not as fervently and not with as much vigor. And I'm beginning to be okay with that.

I really have been taking more active steps in my Christian faith. Part of my walk with Christ has been realizing that my identity is not rooted in performance. My worth is not all wrapped up in, “What's the most creative thing that you've done?”, or, “How good is this thing?”, or, “How many of this thing have you produced in the last X amount of months?”

Work-life balance

What it means to me is allowing time for the different facets of life. The elements of life that are so much more important than what you do for your job. Some of which are simply maintaining relationships with people. It is so easy to get so sucked up in your career that you forget people. That's really disheartening to me. I hate to think that I could have done more to foster and care for a relationship and it fell by the wayside because I was too busy. Because the work life balance was not a balance, right?

All of this stuff is kind of revelatory in a way because when I was younger (and still today), I wrestled with this sense of mastery. I really admire people who are masters of their craft, and to become a master you have to dedicate a lot of time and attention towards one single thing. Playing bass [for example]. If I wanted to become an absolute master, there's a lot of different features and components and elements to becoming a great bass player. It's not just learning notes, it's also speed, it's also dexterity, it's also rhythm. Putting your hands on the neck every day is something that you'll have to do in order to be a master at it. People who are master chefs, that's just crazy to me that you can create something that delicious. That you've really studied the chemistry of a food in order to make it taste great and present it in a really beautiful way. I'm really drawn towards that and I’m trying to let that go a little bit. That fervent desire to be the “best”. I don't think, for me, it's healthy to think in those terms. And it can be damaging if that's where you place all of your worth.

Values

I really value my relationships and I value being dependable. If someone has placed their trust in me, that is a responsibility. I don't know if I placed a certain goal to text a different person every day. I don't think I did that. But I had noticed more and more that I was reaching out to people, to let them know that I was there. It’s wanting to make sure that people know that they are valued because I know how important that can be. I know how frighteningly short on supply that is for some people.

Hope

There is a lot of destruction. There is a lot of despair and a sense of hopelessness. I was really torn up and still am really torn up about what's going on in Ukraine. Then I realized that’s what's getting the focal point of attention, as it should, but there's also stuff I'm trying to educate myself on a bit more like a lot of areas in the Middle East. It's so easy to not know what's going on and to not pray for people who are suffering because you aren't aware that they are. On top of stuff like climate change and global warming. Are we really going to burn up in the next 30 years with the damage that’s been done to the earth and that we continue to do to the earth? That freaks me out, so it's easy to get wrapped up in that.

I'm also inspired and encouraged and have a lot of hope when I see some stuff that humanity can do in a positive way. The fact that humanity is still finding ways to create sustainable energy resources. We haven't adopted them to the scale that would be great to reverse some of the damage we've done. But there are efforts being made and I can't live without that hope. I can't live ignoring that. Look at what people are trying to do to feed the world. Look at all these nonprofit organizations. Look at these scientific achievements where we're able to create more food for people who are starving. And look at the fact that we're trying to adopt more energy efficient vehicles, right? I have some hope that people who have gifts and talents that I don't, are using their gifts and talents to create solutions. It’s incredible to think about how far we have come since 50 years alone. That’s part of a lifetime, not even an entire lifetime. Oh, and just within 50 years, how many strides have been made. I mean, the fact that you're able to record this on your phone right now is really incredible.

That gives me hope that we've been able to make these amazing leaps forward. I think you have to focus on that hope in order to get yourself out of bed. Honestly, the alternative - that's not much of a life, you know what I mean?

Drew Brown | May 7, 2022