James & the construction worker

Life in 5 minutes

I was born in Chicago. I grew up in a neighborhood called West Garfield Park, which was at the time the most violent neighborhood in Chicago in terms of theft, assault, and murder. Grew up playing basketball. You’re fed this narrative of playing sports. Be good at sports. You’ve got to be good at rapping. Everyone wants to box you in.

I was fortunate enough to get out of that environment and get to college and see a different view on life. My life really began in high school. Two defining moments stood out that shaped my life and started me on my current path. Moment one was coming across the story of Herschel Walker.

His story of when he was in high school and how he changed his life through fitness. Doing thousands of push-ups at home. Thousands of sit ups. I was like, “I don't need a gym for this. I'll do the push-ups. I'll do the sit-ups. I'll do the hundreds of pull ups.” He went to Georgia on a scholarship. Won the Heisman, went to the NFL. I was like, “I'll do this. I'll go to the NBA.” I didn't make it to the NBA, not even close. But, I did for the first time in my life realize that I have the ability to change. I did the work and I saw the result. I was stronger, I felt better. That gave me the mindset that I'm in control of my life.

And then I came across Malcolm X's autobiography. He was a youth who grew up in the inner city. He grew up in Detroit I believe. I grew up in the inner city of Chicago and you're fed this message that you can only make it if you're an athlete or you're an entertainer. If you don't fall into one of those careers, you're going to get stuck here.

And then realizing that through education he was able to grow and become a wiser person and overcome circumstances. So that helped to ignite my passion for reading about things I was interested in. Once again gaining the idea that I have control over my life. Those two moments took me to college. Having the courage to even go to college. Having the courage to drop a business major after one day and saying I want to go into exercise science. I want to help people through fitness.

Then accepting challenging career opportunities like interning at one of the top gyms in Chicago. Then accepting a fitness manager position at a very young age. Having the courage to move to California during the pandemic and start my own business. Those two defining moments shaped where I’m at now.

I'm comfortable with taking challenges, and if I fail, so what? I'm in control of my life and I only have one life to live.

Moving to California

My closest friends lived out here. I think they moved maybe a year or so after college. Growing up in Chicago, we didn't go on vacations as kids. My first time being on a plane, I was 20. I don't want to only see Chicago for the rest of my life. I want to live somewhere else. There was a polar vortex the year before. I wanted to move somewhere warm so California just worked out. Somewhere warm, my friends were here and I'm in the fitness industry. It’s a really good place to meet like minded people, have some type of support system and start a new chapter.

What keeps you drawn to fitness?

I determine my life success by the amount of people I help. Fitness helped me get out of a dark moment of my life in those early years. For many people, it's their first path to personal development or self-improvement, outside of school. Fitness is usually the first area where someone sets a personal goal.

I don't look at fitness just as sets and reps. If I did it that way I’d get burnt out. I look at it as a holistic thing, which is why I practice gratitude, mindfulness, and having a positive mindset. I think it expands beyond just the physical. This impacts their emotional, mental, and social wellness. It’s all these different things I can touch on and impact. Makes it fun and unique.

What’s it like being a business owner?

It's challenging in a good way. But I love what I do. I can imagine being in a business that I didn't like where I was just there to make money. But I'm in this business to help as many people as possible. It's time consuming but it's definitely rewarding.

I'm learning right now how to create more balance in my life. That's a goal of mine. Yes, I have business goals. I set some community service goals for the year. I set some social goals for the year.

My success as a person isn't determined by the success of my business. It’s one aspect of who I am. You can fall into the trap of, my business defines me. Setting those goals has been exciting. I set a goal this year to do 24 random acts of kindness.

I have one down. I bought a bouquet of flowers for one of my clients to celebrate our two-year training anniversary. I ordered it to my home. I should have had it delivered to her place but I wanted to surprise her. Then I had to drive there. I'm like how is this gonna fit in my car? I'm not gonna fit and I’m holding onto it as I'm driving.

How has your mental health affected your work?

One thing that comes to mind is when the pandemic happened in 2020, and no one knew what was going to happen, I was stress-eating. Who cares? The world's ending. Eating all the oreos. And then we got the virtual program up for the clients who wanted to train. I was showing up to sessions, low energy. I scheduled calls outside of the workout sessions. These calls were just to talk. And we’d talk about their life, talk about fitness. We’d talk about how they're holding up.

I realized that these workouts and these calls were maybe the only bright spot in this person's day. I realized the importance of what I do for people's mental health and self-care. I'm down moments here and there. Slip ups here and there. I'm always drawn back with my purpose which helps me focus on the bigger picture.

Most damaging myth about self-improvement?

That it’s about coming from a place of hate or not liking yourself. No. I do like myself. I want to see what all I can be. How much better can I be? What can I be? What can I do? I'm great just how I am. But what more is possible? What more can I achieve?

Time

We all die. No one gets out of this alive. Time is time. Time is undefeated, right? I can eat as healthy as I want to. I can work out as much as I want to. There's no guarantee I'm going to live to 99. Accidents happen, right?

I can't control how much time I have so I have to make the most of the time. I have to make the most of today. There is no, “I'm gonna do it next Saturday.” There may not be next Saturday. Let's do it today. To me, that excites me. We only have 50 Saturdays left in 2024. So let's make the most of it.

What gives you hope?

Positive shared experiences. Conversations. When I receive a positive message from someone. Because sometimes as a coach, you can have 37 clients, right? You may have gotten progress reports from a handful of them and they had great results. Then you meet Sue and she’s struggling. What are we doing here? I’m looking back at the notes. What can I be doing differently? How can I help you more? That gets on your mind. Do I know what I'm doing? How can I change my approach to help her?

I collect every time someone sends me a positive message. I'll screenshot it. Someone sends me a card, I'll save it. It's a nice memory that you're helping people. It's cool to have those small quick reminders that I'll read through and it’ll make me feel better. You're not perfect. No one's perfect. But you're improving and you have helped quite a few people.

Most important lessons

I learned we're all in control of our life. If someone doesn't feel like they're in control of their life, they blame everyone else for it. They'll never reach a point where they're truly happy. The moment something doesn't go their way, they blame someone else. They say why me versus I could change this. I can do something and make my way out of this. Some people were born with better circumstances, so be it. But there's someone who was who had your same circumstances and made the best of it.

The second lesson I learned was from my chapter advisor when I was in college for my fraternity. Never present a problem without offering a solution. I always loved that one. Even if it's not the solution that you'll use going forward, it shows you took time to think it over and say I think we can do this.

Most treasured memory

I was driving and I had a really tough day. Middle of summer. Hot. I have the window down. I don't know why I was upset but I was down. I was probably hangry. I was at a red light and I looked across the street. It’s a big street. It's this woman who was a construction worker and she's putting up construction signs. I'm looking off dazed and we make eye contact. And she looks at me. Then she smiles and waves at me. I smile. I wave back. For the rest of the ride I felt so much better.

I realized you never know what someone's going through. The smallest act, just sharing a smile with someone can change that person's day. We think we have to do these big grand acts to make an impact on someone's life. Just one small thing like that made an impact on my day and completely changed it. It stuck with me and I don't even know that person. No matter where you are, you can make an impact on someone's life.

James King III • January 14, 2024